Era Of The Dinosaurs Park
topping off the ensemble by adding a lab coat he hadn't worn in years.
“Are these pants too tight?” Dr. Krycek asked. “Is my hair okay? I want to look good for all those press people out there, you know?”
“Doctor, I really think you should reconsider this,” Lindsay said for the third time that day. “Daniel and I feel that the specimens aren't ready for display....”
“Oh nonsense, Lindsay,” Krycek interrupted. “If we did things your way we'd have to wait years before we could show our results to the world.”
“That's actually a really good idea,” Lindsay said, her voice rising a bit. “We still don't know the long term effects that cloning these creatures will have or the danger they may represent to...”
“It could totally be like Jurassic Park,” Daniel pointed out, momentarily shifting his attention away from his cheese danish.
“Why do people keep mentioning that movie?” Krycek moaned.
“It was a book first,” Daniel said around a mouthful of pastry.
“I know it was a book!” Krycek shouted. “It was fiction! This is reality!”
The three of them stood looking at each other, Daniel continuing to chew. Krycek smoothed the front of his coat and straightened his tie while he composed himself.
“I appreciate your concerns, Lindsay,” he said after a moment. “But there is a monetary concern here. We need to make this presentation, not just for the press, but for the potential investors that I've invited. Cloning costs money and we desperately need money.”
“I know, Doctor,” said Lindsay, sounding weary. “But there are other concerns. Now that we've cloned them we found...well... there are some things about dinosaurs that you may not know about. Things that the cloning has...”
“Things I may not know about dinosaurs,” said Krycek incredulously, pointing at himself. “I have been a paleontologist for thirty five years, Lindsay. I have been named a pioneer in the science of dinosaurs and ancient archeology. I have forgotten more about dinosaurs than most scientists dream of knowing.”
“It wasn't meant as an insult,” Lindsay said slowly, forcing herself to stay calm. “It's just that now that we can actually see how dinosaurs grow and behave...I just really think you should at least look at them before we show them to the investors.”
“Nonsense. I want to see them for the first time while the cameras are rolling. I want them to capture my honest, raw reaction when I see my lifelong dream of actually seeing a living dinosaur realized.
“Now, enough of this bickering. Lindsay, Daniel, it's showtime!”
The murmuring quieted down the moment Dr. Krycek stepped up to the podium. Lindsay and Daniel took up positions on either side of him, though slightly behind, and exchanged a look of apprehension. The look was caught by more than a dozen cameras and would be examined quite closely in the coming weeks.
“Ladies and Gentlemen,” Krycek began. “I want to welcome you here today to what will most certainly be the most memorable event of all of our lives. Since our species began, we have always wondered 'What came before?' and 'What other creatures walked upon this Earth?', but we were unable answer those questions. We dug up ancient civilizations, pieced together a history of our own struggles and conquests, and came to the conclusion that we were the only animals to ever grace the planet.
“It wasn't until the first large bones of the dinosaurs were discovered that we realized just how wrong we were. And how old the Earth truly was.”
Krycek paused to savor the moment and then stepped down from the podium. Bowing his head slightly, as if he were approaching a holy altar, he walked to a large curtain that covered the west wall. Raising his hand to the control that would retract the covering, he turned again to the audience.
“Using cutting edge technology, my colleagues and I have reached back through countless centuries and pulled some of that bygone world forward to today. DNA cloning, egg hybridization,...”
“You made Jurassic Park, didn't you?” a reporter with a prominent hare-lip interrupted.
“I...I am familiar with that movie, but...”
“It was a book first.”
“I know it was a book!” Krycek yelled. “Do you want to see a dinosaur or what?”
The crowd looked at each other uneasily while Krycek tried to regain his composure. Sighing and relaxing his fists, he pressed his finger against the button and the curtain began to slowly retract, revealing a lush jungle filled with gigantic, formerly extinct plants. Moisture beaded against the other side of the reinforced glass that separated the two environments. Slowly, people began to walk towards the glass to look down upon the acres of flora.
“Daniel, please summon our guest,” Krycek said magnanimously. Daniel muttered something into a walkie talkie.
The beads of water began to jump a bit. Speakers set up over the window, which until now had been broadcasting the whisper of the wind and the scattered calls of unfamiliar birds, began to thump with an ominous, steady bass beat. Reporters and investors looked at each other nervously as a tree in the distance shuddered and then toppled over.
“Esteemed members of the press, honored colleagues, fellow adventurers, I give you the king of the dinosaurs....Tyrannosaurus Rex!”
The dense vegetation parted violently as, for the first time in history, the creature whose name meant “tyrant lizard king” was seen by human eyes. It looked up at the people gathered against the window above it with an almost suspicious gleam in its eye.
“What is that all over it?” Harelip reporter asked.
“Um...well...Lindsay?” Krycek stammered, a look of horror on his face.
“It’s long been theorized that birds are descended from dinosaurs,” Lindsay explained. “So it stands to reason that they actually had feathers.”
“But why are they all pink and purple?” a reporter next to Harelip asked, chuckling.
“Its a male, so its plumage may be that bright in order to...”
Lindsay was interrupted by the sudden gales of laughter that came from the delegation. The tyrannosaurus began to walk back and forth in front of the window.
“How are you going to describe its walk?” Harelip asked the other reporter.
“I was going to use the word 'sashay', or maybe 'flounce'.”
Sure enough, the dinosaur sashayed. Its hips and shoulders waving back and forth as it went, its tiny arms brought up close to its chest, like a fussy old lady fretting over what can of beans to buy at the supermarket.
“Does your king of the dinosaurs have a name, Dr. Krycek?” asked the CEO of a major computer company. Krycek remained frozen, gaping at the creature that strutted in front of him.
“Daniel named him!” Lindsay said quickly. Daniel, who had been trying to back out of the room, gave her a dirty look. The reporters turned to him, pens at the ready.
“We...uh...named him Urkel.”
“Why did you name him Urkel?” Krycek asked, slowly coming out of his daze.
The dinosaur raised its head, opened its mouth, and let loose its call. The crowd doubled over laughing.
“It sounds just like Urkel!” Hairlip shouted. “Oh my god, it sounds like Urkel laughing!”
Krycek struggled to think of a way to turn the situation around.
“The park will be safe!” he shouted, sounding almost demented. “There certainly won't be any issue of safety!”
“I bet not!,” one person shouted over the laughter. The dinosaur began to fussily pick at the leaves of a tree, gathering them together so that he could use his tiny arms to fan himself. “Not with Fancysaurus Rex around!”
“God Himself couldn't cause damage to our security system! Quote me on that! God Himself! The park will be very safe. No need to think exciting things would happen.”
“What the hell is he doing?” Daniel whispered to Lindsay.
“He's trying to convince them that nothing else could go wrong, while hoping something does go wrong, so that the media will still pay attention to him after today. Its sad.”
“It will be so safe,” Krycek shouted. “That I plan on bringing along my beloved niece and nephew to our grand opening next month!”
Harelip laughed harder.
“They did that in Jurassic Park.”