Thursday, November 22, 2012

Chrome City Shakedown


Chrome City Shakedown

Part 1.0

Spyder dropped down through the skylight and landed heavily on the concrete floor. Thanks to the new plasteel braces that he’d installed in his legs, he didn’t feel a thing. Grinning and running a fingerless-gloved hand through his greasy mohawk, he made his way across the darkened office to the filthy windows that overlooked the warehouse floor.


Setting his bag down and removing his mirrored sunglasses, Spyder crouched low and peered over the sill, careful not to expose too much of his head. He was fairly certain the anti-spyware virus he’d infected the security system with was strong enough to mask his entry, but a street samurai can’t be too careful. Mentally giving his new cyber-eyes a series of commands, he prepared to scan all optical frequencies for his quarry.

The eyes were Spyder’s new pride and joy, and they had better be, considering the amount of cred he’d had to pay the tech-surgeon to install them. Not that the cred had been Spyder’s own hard-earned cash. That honor lay with Mrs. Ferguson, the old lady down the street whose email he’d hacked months ago. Hopefully she was paid up on her identity theft insurance. If not, tough titty for her. 

“Please enter password.”

Spyder jumped at the sound, coming shamefully close to wetting himself at the shock. It took a moment for him to realize the sound was accompanied by a text display that now floated in front of his vision. 

“What the fuck?” he whispered. The tech-surgeon hadn’t mentioned this. Of course, the tech-surgeon had told him to read the PDF manual that came with the eyes, but manuals were for n00bs. 

“Password must have a capital letter, a numeral, and no repeating characters.”

“Aw, shit.”
Incorrect entry. Password must have a capital letter, a numeral, and no repeating characters.”

Spyder hissed and almost started swearing again. 

“Uhh. ‘Glitterboy2008’.”
Incorrect entry. Password must have a capital letter, a numeral, and no repeating characters.”

“Fuck.”
Incorrect entry. Password must have a capital letter, a numeral, and no repeating characters.”

“Christ, shut up and let me think for one second.”

“Accepted. Please repeat password for confirmation.”

“Wait, what?”

Incorrect entry. Password must have a capital letter, a numeral, and no repeating characters.”

Spyder thumped his head against the wall, wincing at the noise it made. He repeated himself carefully.

“Christ, shut up and let me think for one second.”

“Accepted. Please repeat password for confirmation.”

“Christ, shut up and let me think for one second.”

A happy tone sounded in his ear, the password was accepted. He would have to go in and change it later, after the job got done. For now though, he had business to take care of. Peering up into the window, he took a look down at the warehouse floor. 

Five members of The Nuevogres sat around a card table that was heaped with cred-sticks and guns. Each of the ogres, named for the bio-engineering they’d undergone to make them resemble the mythic monsters, was dressed in a denim jacket with the sleeves cut off. A giant logo - a fiery skull with a pig snout - was crudely stapled to each jacket. Spyder had heard that some kid in the sticks had made the mistake of copying that logo for his own website. After the lawsuit had been settled, they’d found pieces of him strewn all over an alley. Spyder hadn’t known the unlucky bastard, but he’d kill one of the ogres in his memory. 

Bringing up the targeting reticules on his new eyes, Spyder drew a bead on each of the five gang member’s heads. Within a nano-second, each ogre was outlined in red and surrounded by the image of an apple. 

“An apple?” Spyder swore. What kind of assassin used an apple logo for his targeting reticule? Not this one. 

Dropping down against the wall, Spyder moved his hand in front of his face and accessed the settings on his eyes. A cartoon paper-clip on a bicycle wheeled up out of the corner of his eye and parked in front of him.

“Hi! I’m Clip! Looks like you’re trying to access SETTINGS. Would you like a hand with that?”

“Fuck off, Clip,” Spyder whispered. “I just need the targeting reticule changed.”

“You said ‘TARGETING RETICULE’, is that right?” Clip asked. Large, bulb eyes blinked dopily up at him. 

“I said ‘fuck off’, actually.”

“Okay.” Clip wheeled off. 

Spyder waved his hands about, accessing the various pull down menus and folders that he needed. After some digging, he found the reticule settings and popped open the file that had a list of choices. 

Five hundred thousand images scrolled in front of his eyes, making Spyder’s stomach lurch a bit with vertigo. The targets ranged from simple crosshairs to Nicolas Cage’s face to elaborate swirls of psychedelic color. After spending a couple of minutes going through his options, Spyder picked the reticle from the old Predator movie. He had been feeling nostalgic all day. 

“Trademarked image. Please approve charge of @0.99.”

“@0.99?” Spyder asked, incredulous. “Fuck that. Bring up a list of free ones.”

That narrowed the options considerably, and it eliminated the Nic Cage’s head option, so in the end Spyder chose a simple red dot to be his reticule. Sighing, he peered back through the grimy window and targeted the gang-bangers.

It was time to get down to business.

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